Saturday, January 22, 2011

Addendum to "Happy 7th annivesary, Creej."

"Chris loved audio production, and had just been hired by Car Talk, on National Public Radio, one week before he died. He got to work there once before he became too ill to hold a job. Even though this job was a breakthrough achievement for Chris, he was no stranger to the inner workings of the radio business. He had been producing and performing his own show on Allston/Brighton Free Radio, once a week, for a little over a year. That show was one of his proudest accomplishments. He fully acknowledged that he probably had one, if any, listener, but that didn’t matter to Chris. Talking on the radio, playing the songs of his choice, made him beam.

The other morning, I left to drive myself to the train station where I catch the red line to Kendall Square, which is where I work. I have been taking this particular routine commute since I moved in with Jonathan, five months ago. I plugged my iPod into the adapter, as I always do, scrolled through my song lists until I found my last voice lesson, and began to play back my vocalizations, practicing on my way to work. My brief daily car rehearsals make a huge difference in my voice quality, and help me to steadily improve.

Suddenly, through my car speakers, I heard, “You’re listening to Allston/Brighton Free Radio!”

I was confused. I wasn’t listening to the radio, at all. And even if I was, my radio is regularly tuned to NPR, not Allston/Brighton Free Radio.

I stared at the LCD panel, trying to figure out what was happening. My iPod began to play songs in random order. My confusion lingered for a mere moment before I realized that Chris was saying hello to me, the day after our wedding anniversary, and on the birthday of his beloved deceased grandmother, Edna.

Tears of joy came quickly, and my entire being filled up as it always does when Chris reminds me that he’s still with me, that he always will be.

I have only one explanation for how my radio took over my iPod, only one time since I have owned the car, broadcasting a show I don’t even listen to, a show that isn’t even available in my city, on which Chris broadcast his own personal program back when we shared a life together.

He’s here. I rarely have doubts about his continuing presence in my life, and whenever I do have doubts, something spectacular happens to assuage them.

How lucky am to have one husband across the veil, and one soon-to-be husband right here with me on earth?

There is love on every side of me. I know it, because I feel it coursing through my veins.

Shneed.

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